I had a wonderful vacation to the Outer Banks (maybe my favorite place ever) this past week with my cousin Jordan, his girlfriend Andrea, and a bunch of friends. We went down to Nags Head mile post 11 Saturday May 23rd (the house photos are here, I can’t do a copy paste from the official website but will upload my own photos soon). I was able to stay until Wednesday which was wonderful. The weather was gorgeous most of the time; it was rainy one morning which did allow me to do a little outlet shopping so it was acceptable. Andrea cooked wonderful dinners, we played a bunch of board games including Apples to Apples and Taboo, and relaxed on the beach, in the pool and in the hot tub.
Jordan and I acted like complete idiots most of the time (albeit hilarious idiots). We over-shared some classic family stories with people I’d just met, decided to speak and write in haiku form for a few days, quoted Kenny Powers from the TV show Eastbound and Down (read, totally and completely inappropriate in any and all social situations), and went t-shirt shopping.
Now, you may be thinking that t-shirt shopping sounds fine. I mean, it’s a totally normal, socially accepted vacation pastime. Visiting a new place? Buy commemorative clothing to really highlight the significance of the vacation. However, that was not the case with us. We purposefully went t-shirt shopping with every intention of buying the ugliest, most random article of clothing possible. Luckily for us, Nags Head’s T-Shirt Whirl was about 4 houses from our rental. We managed to rope the 2 employees into helping us choose the tackiest iron-on graphics possible. One in the running was a hunting logo that said “Your duck is ugly and your dog is stupid” with a lovely graphic including guns and camouflage. Pissing off other tourists in the shop (a lady left the store b/c of us and yelled “ASSHOLES” in passing), we finally settled on our designs.
Mine is a lovely 10-point buck amidst fall foliage. Jordan’s is a stealth tiger swimming (do tigers swim?) in a lagoon. We put the sweatshirts on quietly while everyone was playing a game. Feigning yawns and holding back laughter while asking the other “Brr, are you cold in here”, we reappeared in our tacky sweatshirt glory.
It may have been the highlight of the trip.
The second part to this post is a website you need to see immediately. It’s called Awkward Family Photos and highlights real, hilarious photos sent in by readers.
Jordan and I may have to submit these sweatshirt photos. Maybe.